Wedded Bliss...Plus Baby

Baby its HOT outside.

2011-07-27T13:14:00.003-04:00

I'm ready for fall. I'm ready for the cooler weather, football, apple cider, etc. I'm also ready to enjoy a cup of hot coffee without sweating to death. There are a lot of things I cant wait to do with Trenton in the cooler weather. My sweet boy is so hot natured that anything outdoors is not always fun for him. With the cooler weather, we will be able to go on more walks and runs. Hopefully he will enjoy it. The arrival of fall also indicates that Christmas is around the corner. This Christmas will be the first Christmas I have spent with my family in three years and the first Christmas I have spent with my sister since 2005- needless to say I am excited to have ALL the kids together!

Lately, I've been thinking about traditions I want to start in our family. I want Trenton to think back on his life and remember traditions we shared. More importantly, I want to create memories that bond our family together. Memories and traditions that Trenton can pass on to his family one day.

One of my favorite memories of my childhood was not a friday night (unhealthy) pizza night, but rather a friday night with homemade popcorn and sliced apples with a rented movie. I loved that tradition.

What are some of your traditions?

Trenton update: He's discovered the joys of tipping over the dog water bowl. sweet.

SAHM.

2011-07-25T07:55:00.003-04:00

For the last week and the next few weeks I am a stay at home mom (SAHM) while I transition jobs. I have to say that I have treasured every single second. I've missed so many of Trenton's daily milestones when I am gone from him 40+ hours a week. I've loved spending quality time with him. Last week, we were both lucky because Jeremy took a vacation week too. We did not do anything extraordinary but simply spent time together as a little family. Our adventures included trips to Williamsburg to visit the winery, cheese chop, and yankee candle outlet. I treasure these times together as we are building memories as a family. I am so grateful for the husband and child God has blessed and entrusted me with.

Trenton update: Trenton is really learning to use his words. He says, "mama" when I go pick him up in the morning. So I know its more than just babbling but he is actually making connections between words and people. He's such a big boy!

Jeremy's Birthday

2011-07-14T09:32:00.002-04:00

Jeremy's birthday was on Tuesday. He told me and his friends to not make a big deal out of his birthday. Note: Never tell someone to NOT make a big deal of your birthday, or something like this could happen: (click HERE).

We love you Jeremy!

Crawling and what-not

2011-07-11T09:32:00.004-04:00

Trenton is crawling. Not far, but he's moving around. This weekend we will be scrambling to plug outlets and install baby gates. I can't believe how much Trenton has grown. He's such a joy and his smile really lights up the room.

Because Trenton was a preemie (and for peace of mind) he sleeps on a monitor at night. Similar to the Angel Care monitor but better in my opinion, the Nanny Breath Monitor monitors breathing and movement throughout the night. It helps reduce the risk of SIDS and helps moms sleep with the peace of mind their kiddo is relaxing comfortably. There is nothing scarier than breaking out into a cold sweat when your child has slept longer than planned. As such, the monitor has really helped me relax and not be oober paranoid. Recently, Trenton has been moving around in his crib a lot at night. I'm not sure how he does it but he will end up completely on the opposite end of the bed. Well, as a result, Friday night Trenton rolled OFF his sensor mat and the alarm that sounds like an air-raid siren went off. Jeremy and I sprinted to his room (along with Leo) to check on our boy. I don't even think it woke up Trenton because when we picked him up he was pretty much out of it and just sleepily stared at us as if to say, "What the crap guys." I think I pulled a calf muscle hurdling the dog. We limped back into our room (Trenton went right back to sleep) and we noticed Pandy was still passed out on the bed. Way to be a team-player Pandy. lol.

Just another night in the Waters' Household. :)

Coupons

2011-07-07T20:02:00.000-04:00

Anyone out there a coupon-junkie? I'm trying my best to be good at it. Coupons allow me to save on average $30-$50 per grocery trip. I think that is pretty good right? Any tips out there? I need to be a frugal mama!!!

Here are some of my favorite frugal mama websites and blogs (click on the title for link access):

Money Saving Mom

The Krazy Coupon Lady

Frugal Mom

Any thing else you can suggest?

Trenton Update: He is successfully scooting around so much that he has knocked over the dog water bowl TWICE- and then stairs at the water rushing over him and laughs. Cute, but messy. Mobility here we go!

Praying for your child.

2011-07-06T16:17:00.004-04:00

I love being a mom. Even at times of complete exhaustion and frustration, I love being a mom. There is no way I could have been prepared for the intense love I would have for my child. Its unconditional, indescribable and sometimes it takes my breath away. I pray over my child every night. Each night my prayer is different, but there is one thing that remains the same. Each night I pray that Trenton grows up to be a man of good, strong character; a man who serves the Lord and serves others. I don't know why I feel compelled to pray that. My only guess is that the Lord has amazing plans for Trenton. As his mom, I will do my imperfect best to raise Trenton to be a man of strong character, who loves the Lord and serves others. I pray he has a good heart sensitive to the needs and feelings of other people. I also pray for his wife, that she too is a person with good character who loves the Lord. These are the prayers of the deepest places in my heart- these prayers move me so much that sometimes I find myself crying. I so want for my child to have a good life.

This love that I speak of brings me to another situation that has weighed heavily on my heart this week and that is the case of little Caylee Anthony. How heartbroken I was to hear of the not-guilty verdict. I do know in this country, you are innocent until proven guilty but I just DO NOT understand how someone who had such a strong indifference to her child was not guilty. Something happening to Trenton is my worst nightmare, I can't even allow my mind to go as far as to think about that. As such, I do not understand Casey's behavior and Mom to Mom, I judge her for that. With all the circumstantial evidence, one thing is clear to me: Her actions during those 31 days were not that of a mother in grief. I wouldn't even be able to get out of bed much less go party. I know that God is the ultimate judge. I pray that if Casey did kill her daughter, that she is haunted by that fact everyday and repents to her Maker. Sadly, I'm afraid she won't do this. I'm still at a loss of words regarding this situation. But it does make me hug my guy a little tighter at night lately....

Trenton,

"Before you were conceived, I wanted you. Before you were born, I loved you. Before you were here an hour, I'd give my life for you. This is the miracle of life (and the love of a mother)"

I promise to pray for you every day, I promise to always be here to give you giant hugs and kisses. I promise to play with you and break away from my busy schedule to make you a priority. You are the light of my life.

I love you,
Mommy

Lately...

2011-07-06T10:35:00.002-04:00

I need to start getting better at blogging. I realize I'm missing major things in Trenton's life. Luckily my mom is good at blogging on Trenton's daily activities. So lately, here is what has happend:

I've been offered a new job teacher at my alma mater. Woot Woot!

Trenton is scooting and just about to crawl

Trenton says mama

Trenton waves "bye bye" and even says "b, b, b" when he is doing it. So cute!

He is loving his table foods and has become quite skilled at feeding himself.

AND, we fall more in love with him everyday. He is just the light of our lives!

Trenton's Baby Dedication.

2011-04-18T08:38:00.005-04:00

On Sunday, May 8 (My first Mother's Day!). Trenton will be dedicated to the Lord at our church. I just can't tell you how excited I am about this. What a special way to spend Mother's Day. Trenton is such a precious gift, and it seems only right we aknowledge God's sovereignty over his life. I think of Deuteronomy 6:4-7, which tells us to love God (as parents), which is necessary if we truly wish our children to love God. My life must be an example for Trenton- an example of a mom who loves Jesus. Not just on Sundays and Holidays, but everyday. I found this little tidbit on a website: Sunday schools can provide weekly instruction, but parents must seize the teachable moments that arise throughout life. Explain the value of prayer, Urge them to read aloud bible stories for devotions.... What encouraging words! If you are around on May 8 at 1045am and would like to come to Trenton's Dedication, we would love for you to be there! The service is at Riveroak Church in Chesapeake (website here).

Snotty Noses and the Crud.

2011-04-14T16:33:00.003-04:00

This little guy is sick right now.

We've had respiratory infections, colds, allergies, and you name it

running through the family.

I was hoping the antibodies in my breastmilk

would keep Trenton from getting sick but

no such luck.

I think this crud was just too powerful

Good thing is, he's been given some antibiotics and will be on the mend

soon!

snotty noses and nasal aspirators are not fun!

Love.

2011-04-11T10:04:00.002-04:00

Gerber Baby? I think so! Of course, I'm supposed to think my child is the most handsome boy in the world and I really really do! But, to all my mommy friends with boys- your's comes in a close second ;) And I totally accept the fact that you'll disagree wtih me. I love being a mom to a boy!!!!

We had a great weekend of relaxation, papers, and The Masters. I think Jeremy really enjoyed playing with Trenton and watching golf. Its going to be one of their favorite daddy/son bonding moments. Golf. Jeremy constantly comments on how he can't wait to take Trenton out of the golf course. I Just hope Trenton is potty-trained by that point. We don't need any mid-course diaper blowouts. Summer is upon us. The weather is constantly up and down and the whole family has been battling a cold that has made its way over to my mom's house (Sorry Moppy!). Trenton has his humidifier on constantly in his room as do we. I'm hoping the pollin and allergins in the air blow away soon! I'm over snotty noses! Bring on the boogie wipes!

Can it be?

2011-03-30T09:10:00.003-04:00

Can it be that I'm almost done with my PhD classes? Its crazy how this has flown by! But on the other hand, I feel like I still have a huge mountain to climb. I keep pushing forward- I'm praying that God hears the desires of my heart. To Teach! And of course, to have a more flexible schedule so I can spend more time with my guy. Will you pray it with me?

I'm trying to keep in my head Psalms 37:4

Delight yourselves in the Lord and He will give you the

DESIRES OF YOUR HEART!

Other than that, we are fresh off of a weekend of family in town. Trenton had a great time visiting with his grandparents from Georgia. I sure we all lived closer together so we could see them more often. We had a blast though, relaxing, shopping, and walking on the boardwalk. That kid is sure loved a lot!

Its Friday... And I'm in Love

2011-01-28T14:07:00.004-05:00

Ok, so I know I talk probably too much about my precious son but I just cannot help it. I mean, you've seen picture of those sweet cheeks. How can you not LOVE THEM and just want to squeeze them. Trenton is surely squeezable and kissable. I was looking back through some of my old blogposts and cam across this post.

As I'm reading it, I clearly remember the feelings I was feeling when I wrote that post. This line caught my attention: "After our talk, I had a dream that I was in a hospital bed in an all white room holding an infant. I believe this was God speaking to me- "You will have a child"... now whether or not that child comes to me the "traditional" way or not- I believe God's word. He will give us a baby when we are ready. I look forward to the day I can hold my daughter or son and play with their little hands and toes. I know it will happen."

I teared up. I know that God was faithful to me in His promise. He didn't leave me hanging. He gave me exactly what I prayed for. I believed God's word and spoke it into my heart. I now am the mom to a precious baby boy.

"I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he will be given over to the LORD." 1 Samuel 1:27-28

Trenton.

2011-01-27T08:04:00.001-05:00

Sometimes it blows my mind that this guy...

is now this guy:

He is truly my miracle!

Organization.

2011-01-26T09:56:00.003-05:00

I feel like I need some extra organization in my life. As you know, babies come with a truckload of stuff. We have bouncy chairs, jumparoos, swings, floor mats for tummy time, toys... you name it. You walk in my house and you instantly notice a little person lives there. As such, I need to revamp the organization in my house. I need to find a way to use every little nook and cranny in my 1800 sq ft townhouse. My mom, who is the organization master has kindly volunteered to help me organize the downstairs closet. That woman is a saint- its not like she doesn't do enough already for us. She watches Trenton EVERYDAY while we are at work. But alas, I need some tips on any good bins or storage boxes you have that can store clothes, toys, really anything. Any tips? thanks!

Baby Einstein

2011-01-15T09:36:00.003-05:00

...Any of my mom friends use this and like it? I know it sounds terrible, but having something to entertain Trenton for just 30 minutes so I can cook dinner would be great. Is that bad? I love playing with my guy but just 30 minutes would be great :)

We have a 3 day weekend this weekend and I have a million projects listed in my head that we need to get done. We desperately need to do some organization and stop using Trenton's room as a storage space. We need a bigger house- but all in due time. I love my little townhouse, and honestly its not so little- 1800 sq feet. But, I'd love to have a big house and yard for Trenton and the dogs. My hopes are that I will be able to get a great teaching job soon. This semester, I have started teaching my first class. Its a Masters level research methods class and I am loving it. I was so nervous about teaching, not because I have a fear of public speaking, I actually LOVE it, but because I was afraid that I wouldn't like it. And then, all this work that I'm doing wouldn't be for nothing necessarily, but wouldn't be for what I thought it would be. But as luck would have it, I love teaching. I try and making research fun and exciting and get the class to interact with me. I have 19 students and teach on Tuesday mornings from 9-12. Long class, but luckily I have a wonderful mentor who is helping me. The class is part of my program, so I'm earning credit for it. Which is awesome- because Im getting credit for doing something I love. So pray that a great teaching position this fall- I'd love to teach in the classroom or online. But ultimately, I'd love to break away from my 40 hour week:)

Love.

2011-01-09T10:27:00.004-05:00

Just a quiet Sunday morning at the Waters' house. (This picture isn't from this morning, but rather New Years). I'm all set and ready to go to church, but Trenton is asleep in his swing and I'm hesitant to wake him up. We may or may not get there this morning but thats ok. I'm spending these peaceful minutes reading my Bible and feeling so grateful that I know Jesus in a personal way. Next week, I have the opportunity to speak at the youth group at my sister's church and share my testimony. I get to share how God has done amazing things in my life and has helped me overcome some serious pain in my life and how He has blessed me with an amazing husband and son.

Sometimes, I forget to be thankful for what I do have and complain about what I don't have. Sure, I'd love a new car and a bigger house but in the long run, those things are not what brings true happiness. (Although a new couch would be awesome because ours is falling apart). As Jeremy and I are working towards goals, we have to sacrifice a lot. He constantly reminds me that I have not chosen an "easy" goal in life and that my dreams are not small. Working towards my PhD has been challenging, fulfilling, and stressful. I just hope that my hard work pays off in the future. I now have an even better reason to continue my work and its this guy:

He reminds me that there is a purpose for my hard work. Not only am I working at becoming Dr. Molly for myself but for my husband and son. I want to give him everything in the world. My unconditional love for him makes me better and pushes me to work harder... I'm so blessed and I can't share that with you enough!

Mama-hood

2011-01-06T09:33:00.003-05:00

This guy:

...has changed my life for the better. I was telling one of my girlfriends this morning that I never knew I could love someone so much. My friend, Laura, is getting ready to have her own sweet baby boy in a few weeks and I could not be more excited for her! In addition to loving my son, becoming a mom has made me love Jeremy so much more, which I also didn't think was possible. Creating a child with someone you love deepens the bonds of marriage. Creating a family is such a gift God has blessed us with. Especially since we were never sure if having our own children was God's plan for us. We are so blessed.

The other night, my dad and I were talking about what is sacred in life and family ranks at the top of the list. Little things, like taking time out to play with Trenton in the bathtub or on the floor are sacred moments that I know I will cherish for a lifetime. Last night, I don't think I sat down from the time I got home until I collapsed into bed. Trenton had me busy- and although I was completely exhausted, my love for him made me love doing things with him and for him because I know that those "sacred" moments with him as a baby will not be around forever. My miracle boy will grow up and take on new adventures.

I have found that if I view things as sacred, I treasure them much more. So for all my mom friends out there, when you're tired and just flat out annoyed (because we would be lying if we said we never were either of these), try and view daily tasks as sacred. It helps- because we all know how quickly these little moments go by!

Merry Christmas!

2010-12-25T01:09:00.000-05:00

Trenton's Birthday- Part 2

2010-12-23T10:30:00.008-05:00

So, my mom and I get to labor and delivery. I'm just praying at this point Jeremy and my dad know where to go. The lady checking me in was extremely nice and helpful and luckily, my doctor was the doctor on call. What good fate that was! First, they said they wanted to do some tests to make sure it was my water that broke and not urine or mucus. I mean really? I lost about a gallon of fluid... I know what it was, but I assume it was all part of the routine.

They wheeled me down to antipartum, which is where you go before you have a baby. I was hooked up to all sorts of monitors so they could keep an eye on Trenton's vital signs. I was so nervous about my little pumpkin in there- I just wanted him to be healthy. The oh so fabulous Dr. Grimes came in to check on me, reassuring me that Trenton would be ok although small. He would have to stay in the hospital for a while, but for the most part he would be ok. His exact words was..."he's going to be a squirt" I was ok with that. I was ok with "small," I just wanted his organs to be developed enough that he would not have to be on oxygen. Dr. Grimes laid out the plan for the next 24 hours. I wasn't dilated yet, so they were going to give me steroid shots to help Trenton's lungs. I received the first one that night at 11pm and then the second one the following night at 11pm. They told me that after the second shot, I would be wheeled to labor and delivery and would start the pitocin drip. yuck.

So the next 24 hours were a whirlwind. I remotely connected to work on Friday so I could wrap things up and keep my mind occupied. I was surprisingly calm, although my sweet husband was not. He didn't show it, but later he told me that was the most scared he has ever been in his life. My sister came into town which was amazing- nothing like your big sis to help you out. Jeremy's mom and grandma arrived that night. I was so appreciative of all the support.

Fast forward to the end of the day. I was wheeled to labor and delivery around 1230 am and they started the pitocin at 1am. I hadn't dilated at all so I figured this whole labor and delivery process was going to be a doosey. I was given ambien to sleep but was so uncomfortable from laying on my left side for hours that it was hard to rest, and then the contractions started. I was so exhausted at this point however, that around 230-3am, I nodded off. But it wasn't a restful sleep. The beeping of the machines, the nerves of having a premature baby, the contractions, the IV's and the monitors did not make for ideal sleeping conditions. Around 445am, I wake to my nurse entering the room in full operating scrub gear. My first thought was..."this can't be good." She told me that Trenton's heart-rate was dropping from the contractions and as such, Dr. Grimes asked her to turn off the pitocin and that he was on his way in. I asked if I was going to have a c-section, and she said yes without REALLY saying yes, because this was the doctor's area of expertise. I wasn't scared about the idea of having a cesarean because from the beginning of my pregnancy I just had a weird feeling this would be the way I delivered. Both my sisters had c-sections and did fine. So I was ok with this- especially if it was best for Trenton. So I asked the nurse if I could get up and go to the bathroom, so she unhooked me from my monitors and I walked to the bathroom with my IV stand. At this time, Jeremy wakes up and sees the nurse with me in full scrub gear and sits straight up and says, "what did I miss." I told him what the nurse told me and he asked why I didn't wake him. Now, this whole conversation happened in about 45 seconds so really I didn't know that much.

Within minutes, Dr. Grimes came in to give us the details. In a nutshell, Trenton was in distress and not responding well to the contractions and pitocin, so he felt it best to go in and get our guy. Naturally, we agreed. The anesthesiologist came in to take my medical history so he could give me the spinal block (which was awesome). And within moments we welcomed our little guy into the world. Trenton Cade Waters was born at 5:43 AM, weighing 5lb and 16.5 inches long. He has brought a joy into my life that I didn't know existed. Everything I do is more joyful because he's in my life. I work harder at small tasks and try and not be bothered by the small things. I am so blessed to be married to Jeremy and be mom to Trenton.

Trenton's Birthday- Part I

2010-12-22T12:23:00.004-05:00

I know most of you are DYING to hear the tale of Trenton's birthday. It was quite the saga...let me tell you! Thursday, September 2 started off like any other Thursday. We woke up and went to work... we got home, went for a short walk and then went back home to eat dinner. I was particularly excited about this Thursday because it was the kickoff to the College football season. South Carolina was playing and most SEC teams do not typically open up their season on a Thursday. So I was excited. The upcoming labor day weekend was full of cookouts and football games- we were looking forward to it. Little did I know however, Sir Trenton had his own agenda. Around 8:45 that Thursday night, I went upstairs to get my pj's on and commence my nightly netti pot routine. For any of you ladies who have been pregnant, you know how crucial the netti pot is to pregnancy sinusitis. Around 9pm, I had just finished my netti pot and was blowing my nose and felt something warm in my undies. My first thought was... "great, I'm now losing bladder control to go along with everything else weird that my body has started to do. Just one more thing Jeremy can harass me for..." So, I went to the bathroom trying to play it off (because my husband was in our room) and immediately knew this was not urine but my amniotic fluid. A wave of panic ran over me because at this moment, I was only 33 weeks 5 days pregnant. Too soon for Trenton to make his grand appearance. Soooooo, the tears came. I was hysterical. I told Jeremy my water broke and his response was..."are you serious." I think he knew by the look on my face that I was serious. So I started hysterically sobbing saying, "He's not ready" but Jeremy assured me that he was ready. I however, meant that I knew my son was extremely premature and would no doubt face challenges in many areas. The first call was to my parents because they live down the street and at that moment I needed to talk to my mom. There is nothing like hearing your mom tell you everything will be ok. My mom then had my sister call me and at that moment the water works really began- both my tears and amniotic fluid were unstoppable at this point.

We had yet to pack our hospital bag because we really didn't think we would need it yet. So, my sister Meghann gets on the phone to tell Jeremy what to pack. I'm watching him repeat what she is saying, but I think he was so nervous that what she was saying wasn't really being comprehended. For example, he said.."ok, pack her some yoga pants" and then he grabbed some of his basketball shorts. I was too freaked out to care at this moment so when we got to the hospital I noticed that he had packed pretty much for him, leaving me his t-shirts and basketball shorts to wear. As such, I rocked out the super awesome hospital again. Again, I was so freaked out I didn't care.

When we arrived at the hospital, the whole bottom half of my body was soaked with amniotic fluid. Some women say that when their water breaks its just a slight leak, others say they feel incontinent... me on the other hand, felt like I was gushing water. Gross I know, but what can I say? Trenton was ready to meet us. Jeremy dropped me off at the door we thought we were supposed to enter through. At this moment, we realized that everything we learned in the hospital tour was insignificant. Jeremy dropped me off and drove away to park... I get up to the door to realize it was locked. Of course, I'm crying hysterically and the guy mopping on the other side of the door tells me to go to the emergency room. Jack ass. I mean really? He couldn't just open the door?

Luckily my parents knew that they had to enter through the emergency room and met us at the door. Jeremy dropped me off with my mom and we walked inside. At this point, I'm sure I looked completely awesome. The lower-half of my body was obviously soaked and I was wearing Jeremy's gray USMC t-shirt. Hotness. There was a long line at the check in table, but I'm pretty sure the nurse standing close by knew what was going on with me so I was quickly wheeled up to labor and delivery....

I'm Back!

2010-12-21T15:40:00.004-05:00

So its been about say... 5 months since I've lost blogged. And it doesn't seem like 5 months, but then it also seems like a lifetime. You see, in the past five months, I've had a baby and completed 4 doctoral courses. Yes I am insane. But I do have to say that my greatest accomplishment aside from my sweet baby boy Trenton is not losing my sanity. I'll catch you up on Trenton's birth another day. Today however, I want to dedicate my post to my sweet husband Jeremy, who has been my saving grace since my water broke prematurely on September 2.

This guy:

...is the most amazing husband and wonderful dad. Never once, have I heard him complain about waking up a million times a night to change a diaper, or clean out the poop in Trenton's bathtub, or running to CVS in the middle of the night to get mylicon. He has helped me recover from an unexpected premature delivery and has continued to let me know he thinks I am beautiful even though I have the post pregnancy body blues. So thanks babe, for being such an amazing dad and husband. These past few months wouldn't have been as easy if you weren't here. Thank you for choosing US over everything else. I LOVE YOU!

Things I'm thankful for....

2010-07-20T09:20:00.002-04:00

I don't need fancy things or exotic trips across the world.i don't need lots of money in my bank account or a big titled job.

I need the little things...because when all is said and done, it is the little things in life that matter the most & make me the happiest.

it is holding hands with Jeremy while taking the dogs for a walk
it is feeling Sparty move around and kick.
it is snuggling during thunderstorms
it is hearing stories about my nieces and nephew that make me excited about being a mom
it is slowly putting together Sparty's nursery, and being amazed that a little person will inhabit that room soon
it is smelling fresh cut grass & rain drops.
it is cutting up fresh fruit for snacks- how i love fresh fruit
it is watching my husband be so excited about becoming a dad
it is watering the flowers on my porch
it is listening to my favorite praise music
it is going for a walk around the neighborhood and rushing home to beat the thunderstorm
it is watching sports with my husband
it is calling my mom and my sister everyday
it is talking to my best friends and having harmless gossip, feeling like we are back in college
it is embracing the hormonal challenges of pregnancy

it is feeling grateful for all that i have been blessed with...
even the little things.

The heat... oh the HEAT!

2010-06-22T08:44:00.003-04:00

This is the first summer, ever, that I have dreaded walking outside. Even walking to my car is a daunting task that I have come to loathe. Perhaps it is the tiny space heater I have inside of me, or the fact that I have about 1/4 more blood running through my veins. I grew up in Florida, and as such, the heat is no stranger to me. Thus, you can imagine how weird it is for me to loathe summer. I'd prefer to stay parked on my couch in front of a floor fan if ya know what I mean. I don't even enjoy the pool very much- after a short bit in the sun I get a heat induced headache and for a woman who can't take anything med-wise, this isn't fun. I do however, love the beach. Perhaps it is the strong breeze that keeps me cool or the chilly water. I have found I can handle this for about an hour or two.

My personal space heater is not so much of a fan of the heat either. Jeremy and I joke that we are going to need to move to a New England state where he can play Ice-Hockey. We aren't really sure how that would work out- since neither of us are experienced with snow and/or ice-hockey. I guess we'll throw it into the learning process that comes with parenting in general :)

Any other mommies out there pregnant THROUGHOUT summer? How did you handle the hottest month of August? I sweat just thinking about it. Ciao!

Father's Day

2010-06-19T10:26:00.002-04:00

Father's day is tomorrow, and this year I have the honor of "honoring" THREE great father's in my life.

1. My love, my best friend, the father of my child- my husband, Jeremy.

2. My dad, my hero, Matt- I love being a daddy's girl even though I'm quickly down-sliding to 30.

3. My super awesome father-in-law, Rick who could possibly be one of the nicest, most genuine guys I have ever met.

Aren't we lucky to have such awesome guys in our lives? Sparty and I were trying to find an available golf-course for dad to go play at, but as I tried to call and make tee-times- EVERYTHING was taken. Bummer... I only called a few courses, so may there is still hope. Tomorrow we plan on going to church and then maybe I'll make dad a nice breakfast.

Thanks be to God for His indescribable gift. 2 Cor.9:15

2010-06-18T09:59:00.004-04:00

Forgive my blogging hiatus. Last week I had a modular class (all day, every day, 8-5pm) studying Communication and Theology. It hurt my brain, but was by far the best class I have had in my PhD studies. It was exactly what I needed both spiritually and academically. I met amazing doctoral colleagues that I know, will be friends for a long, long time.

Perhaps the biggest news of the past 2 weeks is the fact that Jeremy and I are having a SON! We are so thrilled we just cannot stand it. We have been blessed with this most precious gift.

My eating habits...

2010-05-31T19:32:00.002-04:00

I have always been a healthy eater. During my pregnancy, I have developed some weird cravings that are very unlike Molly. I enjoy my veggies and lean meats and protein. The other day however, I craved a McDonald's quarter pounder with cheese. I can honestly say I've never had one of these in my life... EVER. I'm not sure it was all I thought it was going to be. I think I ate about half of it. Jeremy on the other hand, is thrilled that I have navigated (slightly) away from my organic veggies somewhat. I'm sure I'll be back there in no time. Now I have even more of a motivation to eat healthy.... Here is what is going on with Sparty this week:

How big is your baby? About the size of a large banana — and speaking of bananas, if you eat one this week, there's a good chance your baby will get a taste, too. That's because he swallows a bit of amniotic fluid each day (for nutrition, hydration, and to practice digesting), so he eats whatever's on your menu — and gets to put those developing taste buds to good use. So go ahead and eat those veggies: Your baby may develop a taste for them when he’s older.

The more veggies I eat the greater the chance that Sparty will eat veggies...then we will be able to gang up on Jeremy, who does not like his vegetables. Bring on the Broccoli!

Sparty gets the love!

2010-05-25T09:53:00.003-04:00

First, I just want to say that I am overwhelmed at the love and well-wishes I have been getting while on bed rest. I truly have wonderful friends and family who call and check on me every day. And you know, it means more to me that they call to check on Sparty- because really, its all about the baby now. And I'm totally excited about that! So thank you to everyone who calls to check on Sparty. I am journaling about my time on bed rest and I have noted each one of you who has made the effort to check in on us :) I will share with him/her about the time we spent together on the couch/bed. I will also share with him/her all the people who brought meals, sent emails, cards, visited, etc. Sparty truly is grateful and does flips in the belly every time love is sent our way! S/he will definitely know how much you all loved us!

So....

Thank you to my friends who realize that although I have to spend most of my time horizontal, I'm not comatose and still love your phone calls to chat and gossip.

Thank you to Joe Soniak who has stopped by on his way to work to walk the dogs

Thank you to Natalia Soniak for bringing me the most addictive chocolate truffles I have ever eaten in my life... and just sat on the couch with me to watch movies. Oh, and did my dishes.

Thank you to Melanie, my female soulmate who brought me 3 seasons of 90210 to keep me company... and of course, sat with me and brought me the Chik Fil A I was totally craving...

Thank you Karen for your emails throughout the day, which keep me laughing and for making me delish spaghetti and meatballs

Thank you Laura Reichert, for the Chik Fil A cards. I will be hiding them from Jeremy for sure... thank you for popping up on instant messenger to send me encouraging words.

Thank you to my sister Meg who takes all of my phone calls, particularly the... "is this normal" conversation, which would probably gross out your most average individual.

Thank you to my sister Becky who calls me about 3x a day to tell me about her day and keep my mind off the fact that I am utterly bored.

And a big thank you to my parents, who have come over EVERY DAY to do the yard, do the dishes, the laundry, walk the dogs, take the dogs to the vet, keep me company, cook me dinner... the list goes on.

To anyone I have missed, THANK YOU. :) You are truly loved and Sparty will definitely know how much you loved him/her!

Update!

2010-05-24T10:07:00.002-04:00

"You can be just as happy while waiting for your breakthrough

(whatever that may be), as you are when you actually receive it."

Joyce Meyer

Lots has gone on over the past 2 weeks. We'll start with how I've been put on bed rest for almost a month. Baby Waters is good, but I had an infection and a few other minor issues. As such, the baby doctor is being cautious and keeping me off my feet. I'm going crazy to say the least. I'm an active person and hate sitting around doing nothing. I told Jeremy that my butt would be ugly by the time this pregnancy was over due to all the non-activity. Ugly Bootie!!! I'll be excited to get baby and I out for walks and jogs- I'm looking forward to a jogging stroller!

The other update is that Jeremy will be coming home... with me having pregnancy issues, etc. it became evidently clear that the military was not the lifestyle we desire any longer. Having a child in the picture has completely changed our focus and we realize, that while the military provides lots of stability, its just not the path we want to take and feel that God has closed the door one final time. We are excited to start a new journey with our growing family. We are making the effort to allow God to play a central role in the plans for our future. Its comforting to know He has a plan. It is more comforting to know that we are trying to follow it.

We are looking for jobs in the Hampton Roads area. It is the most logical to try and stay here for a while, however we are toying with the idea of looking for jobs in Williamsburg, we both love that area. We appreciate your prayer as we begin yet another journey!

Ms. Pandy

2010-05-11T09:51:00.002-04:00

I'm sure you have read in my blog over and over that Leo is Jeremy's boy.

They love each other.

So naturally, I thought that Leo would have the harder time adjusting

to Jeremy's being gone.

I was wrong.

Leo is fine as long as I give him lots of love.

Pandy is miss mopey pants.

In the picture above, she is curled up with
Jeremy's shirts and pillowcase that I did not wash

so Leo could have something that smelled

like Jeremy for comfort.

Pandy moved them from Leo's bed to her bed.

Pandy is holding the shirts hostage.

She really misses her daddy.

Sparty Gets Married?

2010-05-10T12:32:00.002-04:00

Ok, Sparty is definitely not getting married nor am I picking out his or her future spouse but one thing I AM doing is praying for that future spouse already. Perhaps that boy or girl is growing in the belly at the same time Sparty is, perhaps they are already in kindergarten, perhaps they are not even a twinkle in their mother's eye. But one thing I do know, is that God is not bound by time and He hears the prayers and the sweet wishes I have for my child. After Jeremy's departure on Friday, I started thinking about the beauty of a husband and wife relationship. It is unlike any relationship on earth and God designed it to be that way. Jeremy is my life partner, my best friend, my soul mate. The absence I feel when he is not around for long periods of time, I would consider to be incomparable to any other relationship. God wants us as husband and wife to walk side by side and while we may not do this physically, we have a spiritual connection that is not restricted by distance. I pray that Sparty finds a spouse and has a relationship with that person like Jeremy and I have. I pray that throughout life, Sparty knows his or her true value. I pray this value is reinforced by Jeremy and I, and by one day their spouse.

This weekend...

2010-05-05T08:52:00.002-04:00

My beloved sweet husband will leave me for a few months.

I may not answer your phone calls

and its because I'm allowing the weekend

to throw myself a pity-party

about being alone and pregnant.

but just the weekend

After that, life continues and I will do the things I love,

surround myself with those I love

and continue to be happy and thankful that

I married my best friend.

But for now, please excuse me as I spend the weekend

being bummed out.

I think I'm entitled just a few days, right?

Military Wife

2010-05-04T13:08:00.003-04:00

Thanks to my Mom for giving me an amazing example of what it is to be a military wife... and to all my girlfriends who's husbands are in the military, you are an example to me as well. I am grateful for my husband, his desire to serve, and his willingness to do so. I wouldn't have it any other way!

I Am A Military Wife
Author Unknown
I am a military wife - a member of that sisterhood of women who have had the courage to watch their men go into battle, and the strength to survive until their return. Our sorority knows no rank, for we earn our membership with a marriage license, travelling over miles, or over nations to begin a new life with our military husbands. Within days, we turn a barren, echoing building into a home, and though our quarters are inevitably white-walled and unpapered, we decorate with the treasures of our travels, for we shop the markets of the globe.

Using hammer and nail, we tack our pictures to the wall, and our roots to the floor as firmly as if we had lived there for a lifetime. We hold a family together by the bootstraps, and raise the best of 'brats', instilling in them the motto: "Home is togetherness", whether motel, or guest house, apartment or duplex. As military wives we soon realize that the only good in "Good-bye" is the "Hello again". For as salesmen for freedom, our husbands are often on the road, at sea, or in the sky, leaving us behind for a week, a month, an assignment.

During separations we guard the home front, existing until the homecoming. Unlike our civilian counterparts, we measure time, not by years, but by tours - married at Petawawa, a baby born at Gagetown, a special anniversary at Uplands, a promotion in St Jean. We plant trees, and never see them grow tall, work on projects completed long after our departure, and enhance our community for the betterment of those who come after us.

We leave a part of ourselves at every stop. Through experience, we have learned to pack a suitcase, a car or hold baggage, and live indefinitely from the contents within: and though our fingers are sore from the patches we have sewn, and the silver we have shined, our hands are always ready to help those around us. Women of peace, we pray for a world in harmony, for the flag that leads our men into battle, will also blanket them in death.

Yet we are an optimistic group, thinking of the good, and forgetting the bad, cherishing yesterday, while anticipating tomorrow. Never rich by monetary standards, our hearts are overflowing with a wealth of experiences common only to those united by the special tradition of military life. We pass on this legacy to every military bride, welcoming her with outstretched arms, with love and friendship, from one sister to another, sharing in the bounty of our unique, fulfilling military way of life.

Song for Sparty

2010-05-02T15:46:00.002-04:00

Jeremy and I had a wonderful weekend get away in DC (more about that later). While out at dinner, I heard a song come on the speaker. I think its by Michael Buble actually. Anyways, the lyrics made me think of Sparty, the road we took to get where we are, and the road that God will take us on in the future. As Mother's Day approaches, I realized that I am already a mother in many ways. Its an exciting time for us.... Although I haven't officially met Sparty, I pray for s/he everyday. I pray for a kind heart who loves others. I pray for a heart who knows and loves God... I pray for health and a happy spirit.

Sparty, although I haven't met you yet, the day I found out about you changed my life forever. Your dad and I are already consumed with you... the biggest privilege of our life already, is to be your mom and dad.

And I know some day that it’ll all turn out,
You'll make me work so we can work to work it out.
And I promise you kid that I give so much more than I get
I just haven't met you yet.

I might have to wait, I’ll never give up,
I guess it's half timin', and the other half's luck,
Wherever you are,Whenever it's right,
You'll come outta nowhere and into my life.

And I know that we can be so amazin',
And baby your love is gonna change me,
And now I can see every possibility

Somehow I know that it’ll all turn out,
You'll make me work so we can work to work it out,
And promise you kid, I'll give so much more than I get
I just haven't met you yet.

If you think I'm cute...

2010-04-30T09:16:00.002-04:00

Grandma Waters sent this cute little onsie

for Sparty

If Sparty is a girl, I'll need to bedazzle this onsie

with bows and glitter.

Sparty is so lucky to be spoiled by both sets of

grandparents.

And Mama is grateful for the free clothes!

Anchors Away

2010-04-29T08:42:00.002-04:00

Many of you know that Jeremy is leaving next Friday

for NAVY OCS.

For those of you who do not know this, you're probably

thinking to yourself

"I thought he was a Marine"

Well, he will always be a Marine

but his contract with them ended in December 2009

and we felt it best for our family

to go the Navy route

At work, a party was thrown in his honor

and this fabulous cake was make just for him.

I am so proud of my husband.

I love you Jeremy!

I will be by myself for three months whilst he's

hanging out in Rhode Island.

Dinner invitations welcome. :)

When you're 15.... weeks

2010-04-23T11:33:00.001-04:00

Evenings and My Mom

2010-04-22T09:26:00.003-04:00

The older I become, the more I realize I am not so different from my mom. This is a good thing and something I am very grateful for. Whilst our personalities may be different, there are habits that we both have that as I am in the midst of something I think to myself..."wow I feel just like my wonderful mother." Growing up, I remember we had a no phone calls after 9pm rule. I laugh when I think of when my mom heard the phone ring she would immediately respond..."who is calling so late?" While it may not be late for some, we treasured this last hour or so before bed as just a time to wind down and relax and to spend time together. Last night, my phone rang after 9pm and my immediate response was... who is calling me so late? Now, a few months or even a year ago it probably would not have phased me. Lately however, I hit the bed much earlier and as I was reading cozily in my bed at 915, I realized that I am embodying the patterns that I grew up with. I am happy with that and I realized that after 9pm, I really just don't want to talk to anyone. I want to spend time with my husband, read my book, relax. My brain is dead by this hour (if I am not already asleep!). Reflecting on this allowed me to think about how much I love my mom and all the things she stands for. While we may joke on her about her love for her pekingese rescue and some may find it weird, it may be one of the things I treasure most about her. If the weirdest thing she does is save and help animals, I would say mom ranks right up there with the best of them. I love her pekingese paraphernalia, the dog beds in her house, the countless animal toys scattered around the floor. They just remind me of what a big heart my mother has and how very few people have the willingness, heart, or patience to do what she does. Her love is embodied in everything she does from pekingese rescue to the cross she puts on my forehead before I leave her house. I am lucky to call her mom. I am lucky she's my best friend... and I am lucky that I find myself becoming like her more and more everyday.

almost done!

2010-04-17T11:15:00.002-04:00

My third semester of doctoral studies is almost done!

Can you believe I've been at this for a year?

1/4 of the way done and that much closer to being Dr. Molly Waters!

Catch up with you guys later!

Kisses, Molly

What is in a Name?

2010-04-08T09:27:00.004-04:00

I'm not really stressing about naming my child.

First of all- the gender has not yet been revealed even though

I have a secret "feeling" of what it is but I keep that to myself.

We are pretty set on a girl's name

but its that darn boy's name that has us baffled.

We are CLUELESS.

Nothing has stuck, nothing "fits",

there is nothing we are in love with.

Do we use family names?

Do we use unique names?

Will the child be made fun of for this name?

Ahhh.

Decisions!

I know though, that we will come up with the perfect name if we have a son.

Its a good thing that in the state of Virginia,

only the Mother can sign the birth certificate.

She then decides whether or not she wants

the father's name on it.

Now I would never leave Jeremy off

the birth certificate

but my point is-

he can't pick a name if I'm still drugged

haha :)

Where will we go?

2010-04-01T10:23:00.002-04:00

In about a year, we'll be moving to "somewhere". Depending on Jeremy's duty assignment, we could be anywhere from Hawaii, to Cali, to Florida, to Virginia... Really we have about a 10-15% chance of going anywhere. We have discussed our wishes and hopes, but really we don't have much of a say in where the military will send us. A part of us would like to stay here so I can finish school (with tuition remission), but another part of us would love, love, love to go to Hawaii whilst we're young and our family is young. Moving away will be tough, but I am excited to have new adventures with my husband! So, if we move to Hawaii- pack up your snorkel gear and surf boards! And bring the benedryl for the long airplane ride! The more I think about it, the more I hope for Hawaii for a few years!

Spring has Sprung

2010-03-31T09:05:00.003-04:00

I am so excited for warm weather this weekend. Whilst I'll probably be inside explicating theories and conducting research, I hope to get a little vitamin D. The next few weeks are going to be tough for me- preparing for Jeremy to leave and finishing out the semester. If you don't talk to me much, please do not take it personally and know that I still love you very much :) As far as the pregnancy goes, things are well. I'm almost 12 weeks, which means that next week (according to some websites) I will be in my second trimester. Wooohoo! Some sites say you are in the second when you get 12 weeks, some say its 13, and some say its 14. I figured I'll just shoot for the middle week. I'm praying that at my next appointment, we'll be able to hear the heartbeat through a doppler (handheld ulstrasound device)... I'd love for Jeremy to hear this prior to his leaving.

Sparty this week (according to BabyCenter.com: Your baby, just over 1 1/2 inches long and about the size of a fig, is now almost fully formed. Her hands will soon open and close into fists, tiny tooth buds are beginning to appear under her gums, and some of her bones are beginning to harden.She's already busy kicking and stretching, and her tiny movements are so effortless they look like water ballet. These movements will become more frequent as her body grows and becomes more developed and functional. You won't feel your baby's acrobatics for another month or two — nor will you notice the hiccupping that may be happening now that her diaphragm is forming.

"How are you Feeling"?

2010-03-24T13:27:00.004-04:00

Jeremy says belly shots are white trash but whatever. lol

I swear I get asked that question a million times a day... its not just the question, but the nonverbals that go along with it. The sound of disdain in the voice, the look of pitty, the concerned wrinkles on the forehead. Really I just want to scream... "I'm pregnant I didn't lose a leg and I'm not dying!" I know the questions are out of concern but quite frankly, they are just getting annoying. I'm feeling fine- no throwing up (I can proudly say I have not puked ONCE in the last 11 weeks). Other than other mild pregnancy symptoms and a sinus infection (that made me want to jump out a window), I am really feeling pretty good. There are days where I have to remind myself that I am pregnant because other than the massive melons where my chest once was, I feel normal!

This week, whattoexpect.com says "At 11 weeks pregnant, your lower abdomen is probably just starting to protrude a bit now (though you likely still look less like you're pregnant and more like you've been overdoing the doughnuts)." Honestly, I feel like I started showing pretty quickly and I'm not sure why. I've repeatedly been asked..."are you having twins" and the answer is NO. We have been twice confirmed that there is one baby in the belly. :)

Cinnamon Nutmeg Waffles

2010-03-23T18:26:00.000-04:00

Cinnamon Nutmeg Waffles

Preheat waffle iron according to manufacturer’s directions.

2 cups all-purpose flour
1/2 teaspoon baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon salt
2 tablespoons brown sugar
1 tablespoon sugar
2 tsp cinnamon
1 tsp freshly grated nutmeg
3 eggs, beaten
4 tablespoons butter, melted
2 cups buttermilk, room temperature

In a medium bowl, whisk together flour, baking soda, baking powder, salt, sugars and spices. In another bowl beat together the eggs and melted butter, then add the buttermilk. Add the wet ingredients to the dry and stir until combined. Allow to rest for 5 minutes.

Names...

2010-03-11T14:48:00.003-05:00

Jeremy and I are thinking of names to call our youngin' whilst in utero.

Suggestions?

Jeremy votes we name them Sparticus.

When I asked him why, he said....

'cause right now s/he is enslaved

in your belly with no hope of escape

until he "breaks out" of bondage to freedom!!!!

How can I argue with that? Sparticus it is.

3 is better than 2

2010-03-05T10:02:00.004-05:00

Baby Waters will make its appearance

on our third anniversary

we are over the moon!

2010-03-01T15:23:00.001-05:00

I found this photo online....

does it really need explaining?

Amazing.

I'm Back.

2010-02-27T10:46:00.003-05:00

Its true- I'm still alive. The past month has been a little crazy for me and I'll share more with you about that soon. Currently, I'm balancing a lot and it has sent me into a hormonal overdrive. I started crying hysterically yesterday to Jeremy because we ran out of toothpaste. I am so blessed with an amazing husband who, even in my most ridiculous times, still adores me (or at least, pretends too).

Lately, I've been communicating with God a lot. In my life, I have experienced significant healing through simple prayer and a willingness to be healed. Actually, it was more like a desperation to be healed. As I am currently in a new situation that is completely foreign to me, I am once again in that desperate place. Lord- Place your hand on me, guide me, protect me. I am powerless in this current situation and need You.

I am so thankful that God created Jeremy for me- and I for him. Jeremy is a gift I don't deserve. How did I get so lucky? I don't know another man on this earth that would put up with me. Isn't it mind-blowing that when you were being created in your mother's womb- God was creating you, with your spouse in mind? God knew that Jeremy would be exactly what I needed and always wanted. I'm am completely head over heels in love with that man. And quite frankly, I think he's a stud.

If you know what is going on in my life, I am just so thankful for your prayers and support. I love you!

Beautiful Jesus

How may I bless Your heart?

Knees to the earth

I bow down to everything You are

Beautiful Jesus

You are my only worth

So I will embrace You always

As I walk this earth

Here are some pictures of the 9 to 11 inches of snow we got!

2010-02-01T11:48:00.004-05:00

Goofy Girl Pandy

Jeremy and Leo

Our house on the end!

Vacation Ideas

2010-01-29T09:37:00.003-05:00

Jeremy is leaving for three months in March for OCS. He will be "free" in June. After his graduation and a couple of days with family, I hope to whisk my husband away on a romantic getaway. I remember my mom doing this with my dad post deployment and I think it is truly pivotal for married couples to "reconnect" after long separations. I remember picking my dad up from the pier, we would have a celebratory lunch, and then my parents would leave for some time alone. My grandparents would watch my sister and me while my parents left for a couple of nights. It was always a fun time with my grandparents. I never really understood why my parents left so quickly, but as a married woman now, I totally get it.

I need some vacation ideas for June. Jeremy will be graduating in Rhode Island and I'm not very familiar with it up there. Any suggestions? Of course there is always Vegas!

Bed Time in Our House

2010-01-26T08:55:00.003-05:00

Last night, Jeremy wanted to go to bed early.

The problem is, we can never go to bed early in our house.

The dogs think that bedtime equals playtime.

They wrestle (typically on top of us), bark, scratch, cuddle....

I think its quite hysterical.

Here is a picture of Jeremy trying to sleep last night...

You can see Pandy and Leo

just weren't having it.

Nap Time

2010-01-20T14:27:00.004-05:00

One of my favorite things to do is to take a nap with my dogs.

I love how they just curl up around my legs.

Its amazing how an animal can make you feel so loved!

How do I love thee?

2010-01-11T09:04:00.000-05:00

How do I love thee?

Let me count the ways.

I love thee to the depth and breadth and height

My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight

For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.

I love thee to the level of everyday's

Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.

I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;

I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.

I love thee with a passion put to use

In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.

love thee with a love I seemed to loseWith my lost saints, ---

I love thee with the breath, Smiles, tears, of all my life! ---

and, if God choose,

I shall but love thee better after death.

-Elizabeth Barrett Browning

confused.

2010-01-09T09:40:00.001-05:00

So whilst watching the news this morning, a commercial break aired a McDonald's commercial, highlighting the Avatar happy meals. Here is where my confusion begins. Isn't Avatar a PG-13 movie? Granted its a cartoon, action, love story all wrapped up in one... why the crap would McDonald's have a happy meal with an Avatar theme? How many 13-year olds do YOU know that buy happy meals? Badly done McD's... badly done.

What would you do?

2010-01-08T08:56:00.003-05:00

Jeremy and I were talking last night about "what would you do"... you know, those kind of conversations you just play around with. Like, what would you do if you wont the lottery. Jeremy asked me if he was President of the United States, what would my platform be as First Lady. Naturally, I said Animal Rights but Jeremy cringed.

I thought about it last night, and decided that as a victim of childhood abuse, I would gear my efforts and energy towards helping children who are victims of the same type of abuse I was. Abuse as a child seems to impact the life of the individual in dramatic ways, most of which are never dealt with. Without some sort of help, the life begins to spiral downward... it almost happened with me and I've seen it happen with other people. Luckily, I have proactive parents who put my butt in counseling, before they even understood the root of my issues.

Today, I have come to a place where I am proud of my background and the good I have been able to do with it. Don't get me wrong- I would have preferred to not go through challenges like I did- but I am a firm believer in Jeremiah 29:11. This verse, and God's gentle, yet protective hand on my life has made his presence very real in my life. And although I am constantly messing up and living a life that is far from perfect- my understanding and acceptance of God's love is so real. Understanding the basics of Christianity is really quite simple- it can be described in the preschool song "Jesus loves me".... I think we fight and rationalize faith so much that we lose the most basic understandings of it all... God loves you, accept that love and His plan for you and your life will be radically changed. I promise. And the other fact of the matter is- I'm not going to be running into heaven... I'm going to be tripping and stumbling in... just like I trip and stumble throughout life. But I know this- I know what is before me. Even as I fall, I know what is there ahead of me and that my friend is what gets me up and keeps me going.

Back to School, Back to School.

2010-01-05T12:17:00.004-05:00

Today I start my third semester of doctoral studies. Can you believe it?

And can you also believe that I received A's in both classes last semester?

Jeremy says I am no longer allowed to doubt my abilities to do well in my PhD

I have class today

Com 708 History of Communication Studies

I am pretty excited about it

and I am armed with a back to school gift from my mama

this fabulous purse:

And yes, that's my new runner's magazine in case I get bored in class -Kidding! I'm still coming off vacation mode, even though I felt like I was gone the whole time. Can I just complain real quick that it cost over $200 to drive to and from Georgia?

I think Gas companies should give a holiday gas rate.

I think I'll write a letter.

Happy Tuesday!!

2010.

2010-01-01T10:44:00.002-05:00

I have vowed that this is the year I'm going to get my health back. I am so close! (minus the 20lb plus weight gain). This year, instead of making new years resolutions- I am vowing to treat my body like a true temple. Look at all it did for me over the past 3 years- it fought! As such, I am going to fight for it! I am going to eat more organic products and vegetables that have cancer fighting anti-oxidants. I hope that by the end of the semester (in 4 months) I will have lost about half of my cancer weight, which is about 10lbs. I can do it! Since I was jacked up on 'roids- It may be harder to get off but I have faith in myself. If my body kicked cancer, it can kick off some weight.

Jeremy is going to be on this road with me... I have such a wonderful and supportive husband! He doesn't like veggies but is slowly starting to like new recipes I try. He ate asparagus the other week- it was a miracle. So, this year- each week- I'm going to post a [healthy ones] that are husband approved. I'd love to see yours too!

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!

Christmas Recap

2009-12-31T20:37:00.003-05:00

We are back from a wonderful trip to Atlanta, where we spent Christmas with Jeremy's family. I was truly spoiled by my in-laws (and loved every minute of it!). We spent wonderful time with Jeremy's longtime friends and family.

Here you can see Pandy getting spoiled by Grandma Albaugh.

Lawson Christopher McKnight

2009-12-22T15:02:00.002-05:00

Lawson Christopher McKnight, born 9:20am

December 22, 2009.

7lbs 5oz and 19.5 inches!!!!

My Dear Sweet Nephew,

Welcome to the world! I am so blessed that God has allowed me to be your aunt, as well as the aunt of your two precious sisters and cousins. You are only a few hours old; far too young to read this blog but I want you to know how much your Auntie Molly loves and adores you already. You came into this world three days before Christmas, which is perhaps the greatest Christmas gift any of us could have received. I promise to spoil you rotten and kiss on your precious face every time I see you. I know you will be a ray of sunshine to everyone around you, especially your sisters. I pray you have a special bond with your sisters, like I have with your mother. I promise to be here for whatever you may need. I promise to give you everything your mom doesn't want you to have and I especially promise to beat up any girls who try and date you. You have been born into a very loving family and you are the apple of all our eyes! Sweet, sweet Lawson- welcome to the world!!

Love, Auntie Molly

The Fourth Wise Man

2009-12-20T11:27:00.002-05:00

One of my favorite holidays stories is The Fourth Wise Man. There are different versions of it, but the one I know and love tells the tale of a man named Artaban. Artaban was supposed to meet the other Wise Men when the star proclaiming the Savior's birth appeared. They had a plan to travel to the birthplace of the Son of God and present their precious gifts of gold, frankinsense, myrrh, and several large jewels that Artaban would bring. When the star showed, however, Artaban was late, and the others went on without him.

Artaban, unwilling to give up, followed the star on his own. He came upon a town where Roman guards were taking the children under 2 years old, by Herod's decree. Artaban, hearing a muffled cry from one of the houses, entered and found a woman there, hysterical and clutching her baby. A Roman soldier soon came and tried to enter the home, but Artaban paid him off with the huge ruby he had been saving for the Savior, thus saving the child's life. He took comfort in knowing he still had an emerald, a diamond, and a pearl to give to the Savior.

The rest of the story goes on to tell of Artaban's travels, and how he found more people to help, each time sacrificing one of his gifts for the Savior. At the end of his life, he arrived in Jerusalem, on a day where a man named Jesus would be crucified. He was saddened to hear of it, but did not know that Jesus was the man whom he had been seeking for so long. At one point Artaban heard a disturbance behind him. He turned to see a soldier trying to take a girl from her parents. When questioned, the soldier revealed that she had been sold as a slave by one of her parents' creditors. Artaban, with his last precious jewel, paid the debt the parents owed and liberated the girl.

At that moment, there was an earthquake--for this was the moment the Savior died--that made a wall to fall on Artaban. In his dying moments, he despaired that he had never found the Savior and given him his gifts. But right before he passed away, he heard a voice saying "Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me." In all the ways he had served and loved others, Artaban had indeed found his King.

Each year at this time, I am reminded of Artaban and his quest. I am always pulled, no matter how far I am spiritually from where I should be at the time, to launch my own journey to find the Savior. I am hoping to find Him this year through loving service to my family and by stilling my own desires and selfish needs.

What will your journey be like?

Repost...

2009-12-18T09:16:00.002-05:00

I am reposting an entry I wrote last year....

One of my favorite things to do after the Christmas decorations are all put up, is to be sure the house is extra clean, turn off all the lights (save the ones from the decorations), make sure some yummy smelling goodness is floating through the house and just feel peace. Almost as if I am trying to summon it during the chaos that is usually bouncing around in my head. I love to drink in the quieter parts of the season. To be still.....the wonder what the Silent Night might have been like. To be grateful that I am Home for the Holidays and truly marvel at that O Holy Night.

One of my favorite Christmas songs is called Breath of Heaven by Amy Grant. To those of you unfamiliar with the lyrics they read like this:

I have traveled many moonless nights,
Cold and weary with a babe inside,
And i wonder what i've done
Holy father you have come,
And chosen me now to carry your son.
I am waiting in a silent prayer.
I am frightened by the load i bear.
In a world as cold as stone,
Must i walk this path alone?
Be with me now.
Be with me now.

Breath of heaven,
Hold me together,
Be forever near me,
Breath of heaven.
Breath of heaven,
Lighten my darkness,
Pour over me your holiness,
For you are holy.

Breath of heaven.
Do you wonder as you watch my face,
If a wiser one should have had my place,
But i offer all i am
For the mercy of your plan.
Help me be strong.
Help me be. Help me.
Breath of heaven,
Hold me together,
Be forever near me,
Breath of heaven.

Breath of heaven,
Lighten my darkness,
Pour over me your holiness,
For you are holy.

Breath of heaven,
Hold me together,
Be forever near me,
Breath of heaven.

Breath of heaven,
Lighten my darkness,
Pour over me your holiness,
For you are holy.
Breath of heaven.
Breath of heaven.
Breath of heaven.

I particularly love the verse that I highlighted in red. I think of Mary and the tremendous task before her. How inadequate, how ill-equipped she must have felt. But she offered all she had. I am inspired by her courage and her commitment to do what God asked. Though I in no way compare myself to Mary......I have a burning desire (that gets loaded down with so.much.junk.) to do what my Father in Heaven wants. To offer all that I am. For the mercy of His plan. Often when I am befuddled by how best to serve my family, how best to love them, I hear the phrase from that song (even when it is not Christmas).

Help me be strong. Help me be. Help me.

And He always does. He always does when I allow Him to.

Bob III

2009-12-14T07:35:00.000-05:00

For those of you who have asked, yes we name our Christmas Trees.

They are all named Bob.

Our first Christmas married we had "Bob".

Last year was "Bob Jr."

This year... Its Bob III.

You get it.

Here is Bob with his good buddy

Mr. Fireplace (who has no name).

Nylons.

2009-12-13T09:51:00.000-05:00

Nylon's bug me and I really hate wearing them.

They are hot, sticky and confining!

I can't even begin to tell you how many times I have heard that I should wear them,

especially to work.

Seriously? Where does it say that? I want to know.

10 commandments of Blogging-

2009-12-12T08:20:00.000-05:00

Thou Shalt Not Have Auto Play

We knowest that thou liketh the music. However, when thou shares a video, or is telling me about a touching moment in thine day, I do not needeth to hear "Baby Got Back!" at 1,000,000,000,000 dB. (<-thateth means decibels.) I also do not appreciateth having to scour your sidebar for the mute button so that I can restarteth the video in the first place....eth.

Thou Shalt Not Cram Thy Sidebars with Crap

It is not appeasing to mine eye. And I shall see fit that you know it by declaring today UnCluttering Day in Blogdom, which will be celebrated from henceforth and forever on the first Friday of every month. So go, and do these things which I have commanded or else be faced with mine wrath.Thou Shalt Obey the Law of Attribution And give credit where credit is due.

Thou shalt NOT steal other people's words. (Tho if thou must do a meme every now and again, we bequeath thee, to make it original and genuine.)

Thou Shalt Respect the Blogger

We wisheth to make you understand that bloggers are sharing their life with thee. They should be treated with dignity and respect. Thy blog is an extension of thy living room, so if whosoever asks that ye removeth your shoes before entering, you shall receive him inasmuch with a willing heart. Noteth of Great Importance: Etiquette is Subjective. What action is required and applauded on one blog may not be on another. Use wisdom in thy dealings with thy fellowmen.

Thou Shalt Be Brief. And to the Point. And use correct Grammar.

We knoweth thou has lots to say. But in doing so, you must excite us and help us to understand. Thy blog readers are like sheep, and they are easily misguided and lost amid long-winded paragraphs. Be a good shepherd and help us to understand thy parables, that we might learn from them.

Thou Shalt Blog For ThyselfIf thyself does not love thy blog, we cannot love thy blog.

Wouldst thou go a a week without food or drink? I say nay, but thou wouldst abandon thy blog with no second thought? Verily, I say unto you, it is not required that thou shall post daily, but more than 10 days is cause for alarm. If thou dost vacation, thou shall leave notice in the form of a post.

Thou Shalt Not Post Incessantly Thou art not Perez Hilton. Thou dost not need to update thy blog when thou goeth to the bathroom. Thou must be strong and resist the urge to share that one hath made use of the toilet at precisely 12:14. Less thou had a child in that bathroom, I really shalt not care. Quality, not quantity, is the proper aim.

Thou Shalt Screw the Numbers

We knowest that thou liketh the comments. Leaneth in closer as I am about to impart great wisdom on thee..... the numbers don't matter. Thou art blogging for thyself. And thyself rocketh. Show us how much thou rocketh, and we shall give thee praise. But if thou hideth thine awesomeness under a great rock, we shall not see it. It is with great wisdom that I tell you to ignore thine statistics. Thy head doth get too caught up in the nonsense, and then the head doth command the fingers to do stupid things. If thou are questioning if something thou didst was stupid, it probably was. There are many a great unknown and obscure blogs. We say it is better to be obscure than to be crap. And above all, thou shalt remember, connection beats transaction.

Thou shalt link with love Thou shalt not demand link love be reciprocated.

If thou lovest a blog and wish to link, then thou art welcome. If thou liketh a blog but only because thou wisheth to be on thy blogroll, then I say to ye, Get Over Thineself, thy goal is transparent as a windowpane. Nevertheless, be generous with your link love, and build connections with thy readers. Generosity begets generosity.

Thou Shalt Respect Privacy

Whilst thine own blog is welcome to all, your fellowmen mayst not appreciate the traffic. Truly, thine fellowman may be journaling for none other than his self. They may feel nervous and scared when unknown forces fall upon him. If thou wishes to link, use the same discretion of thine fellowman. Do not use their entire full names, as they are highly google-able. And thou shalt not collect email addresses for purposes of spam.

You know what?

2009-12-11T09:55:00.003-05:00

If the 17-year-old version of me could see me now, she would probably throw up. You see, when I was 17- I wanted to get married young, whilst still in college-At like 20 (thank God this didn't come to fruition). I wanted to get pregnant and have a baby before 25 (again, PTL this did not happen). Instead, I got married at 26, over a year AFTER I finished my Masters degree. A year and a half later, I started my Doctorate, and I still have no babies.

Before I got married, I had a very full time job (still do). I was a modern, independent, working woman. I lived with my best friend, had a cute place.... I did find and marry “Mr. Right.” The one who who encourages me to continue my education and to have Girl's Nights Out. The one, who has the proper view of what a woman should do and should be, which is:

Whatever she damn well pleases.

Seriously Ladies, I never couldda married a guy who thought my place was in the kitchen, or ironing his clothes. Screw that.

I have a friend who is the perfect little Modern Molly Homemaker.

She gets herself up early (as in E-A-R-L-Y)

to pack her Hubby's lunch and give him a kiss before he leaves for the day.

She has homemade dinners on the table every night,

and her hobbies included things like sewing quilts, curtains, and Prom dresses.

Making bread. Canning Jam. Gardening.

Her house is always clean. Seriously.

I'm not making any of this up.

I can't decide whether she is either stupid, or crazy.

Now I know that not all women are like me, and some women like to be stay at home mothers, non-working women, dependent on their husbands. And this in itself is beautiful, because it is what that woman "damn well pleases" to be. I have realized that there is a beauty in diversity.

However, I guess a part of me feels sorry for women who didn't get to have that period of life where they were fiercely independent, bounced checks, had crazy nights out with girlfriends, ate an apple and had a glass of wine for dinner, etc. I consider these single days with my girlfriends some of the most memorable times I have had in my life. I learned how to take care of and support myself, which I believe makes me a better caregiver. I learned how to balance keeping a clean house, working 50 hours a week, and going to graduate school. But again, these are the choices I have made. I will probably never be a 100% stay at home mom- Its just not me. I will probably always teach at least one class or aerobics or something... and you better believe that I'm not torturing myself through my doctoral studies to stay at home. Again, I am unique. I love being my own person, feeling accomplished, and challenging myself- daily. So I encourage you working women, stay at home mothers, students, etc., to challenge yourself daily. Whatever you choose to do, whether it is reading a good book, a challenging workout, a DYI project, always do something that makes you feel accomplished. There is nothing better than going to bed at night, feeling that you had a productive day!

Christmas at the Waters

2009-12-10T12:06:00.002-05:00

Fur das Kind Memorial

2009-12-04T20:38:00.002-05:00

A few years ago when I was studying in England, I saw a small holocaust memorial in central London called "Fur das Kind" which commemorates the Kindertransport, a rescue mission that saved around 10,000 mainly Jewish children from Nazi occupied areas just before the outbreak of WWII. I saw the memorial being constructed in 2003, and when it was revealed it consisted of a statue of a small girl besides a transparent suitcase filled with memories from her home (books, toys, photographs of her mom and dad and other family members who almost certainly perished in the Holocaust). As the suitcase was transparent, it was not a good place to store actual memorabilia that children brought from their homes, so now there is simply a statue of a little girl with sad eyes.

This is perhaps one of the smallest memorials to the holocaust, but there is something so heart wrenching about it. Thinking of children who had to say bye to their parents, and parents who had to send their children away; knowing they would not see them again just gets to me. THe first transport arrived in England on December 2, 1938, bringing about 200 children from a Berlin orphanage that was torched by Nazis the previous month- the transport continued until the outbreak of the war. Most of the children on the transport are unknown but most were Jewish from Germany, Austria, Czechoslovakia, and Poland. Once the children arrived in London, they lived in transit camps until families came forward to take care of them. Older children were put into foster care, boarding schools or sent to the country's labor force

(probably not what their parents thought would happen to them, but better than the fate they would have received in their homeland). Many families though- Jewish and non-Jewish, stepped up to help these children. Most of the children survived the war, but few were reunited

with their parents.

The below picture is an actual child from the kindertransport

This is the memorial....I am happy to have read that it is being restored

You can read more about the new memorial HERE

holiday traditions

2009-12-03T10:16:00.000-05:00

What are your favorite holiday traditions?

Do you make sugar cookies and take them around?

What about the 12 days of Christmas or Secret Santa?

Do you read a Christmas Storybook every night

Or go Caroling?

What are some of your favorite holiday traditions?

Lets share them all -- even if you think they are insignificant.

We all could use ideas on ways to make the holidays more meaningful.

Picking Baby Names with no Baby.

2009-12-02T09:45:00.002-05:00

I'm just gonna say it quickly. Jeremy and I are starting to get baby fever. Ok its out now. Comment as you like. Regardless, after over two-years of marriage and my treatments ending, we are inching towards the idea of adding to our family (I can see my Mom-in-Law jumping out of her chair as she reads this :) haha love u, Gloria!). Jeremy and I have talked about baby names and have raddled around with some we like (totally premature, I get it- but every girl KNOWS what they want to name their baby by the time they are like, 10-years old). Jeremy is Thomas Jeremiah, and his father is Thomas Rick... naturally a boy would be Thomas [insert middle name here]. We have a few middle names that we like and would probably not share them until the baby's birth just to be mean. And ok... for girl names, I love the name Sophie. I just think it is precious. I had a dream I named a little girl Sophie Berlynn... weird? Probably. But anyways, this is my announcement to the world that I have baby fever. And... you love it!

Pandy

2009-11-21T09:04:00.002-05:00

(Pandy hiding in shame because of her weight gain.)

I'm a bad mom.

Pandy, has apparently gained 3 pounds,

which is about 18% of her body weight. Poor girl.

She's on a diet.

I wonder if that is why she's had such horrific gas lately?

It will seriously clear you out of a room.

Her gas is the SBD kind (silent, but deadly).

I don't like to call Pandy "fat" because I think that is an ugly word.

She is "pretty plus "...

hopefully she doesn't get too pretty

or else her legs wont be able to support her.

update!!!

2009-11-19T08:36:00.002-05:00

For those of you who are keeping track of my treatments, I am down to the last 3 bottles of pills. (Que the Hallelujah Soundtrack). I had been saving a lot of my medicine bottles, hoping to have a bonfire and burn them. However, I figured I would be doing wrong by the environment if I did that, so I took the bottles to the pharmacy for recycling instead. Nothing like handing the Pharm tech four one-gallon bags of old pill bottles. They just raised an eyebrow at me....whatever.

As my hormones are going through "reconstruction" as I like to call it- I have had these weird phases of emotional instability (my husband would probably argue that this is not abnormal for me, but whatev). I was driving home from work the other day and heard a country song on the radio that I have not heard in well-over ten years. Its your typical country song, about a guy who loves his dog. I started crying. Crying to the point i had to pull over in the Mennonite Church parking lot to get myself together.

Sweet.

Whilst sobbing in the parking lot, an Amish looking woman

walked by my car and just stared at me blankly.

Double Sweet.

I figured I needed to suck it up and drive home.

So that's what I did. And proceeded to love on my kids.

So before you think I'm completely crazy, look up the lyrics

to "Feed Jake"

and tell me you wouldn't get teary eyed too!

Cold Weather Favorite

2009-11-17T03:37:00.000-05:00

Chili
2 Tablespoons olive oil
1 medium yellow onion, cut into 1/4 inch dice (about 3/4 cup)
1 Tablespoon minced garlic
1 1/2 pounds lean ground beef (could use ground turkey)
1 Tablespoon ground cumin
1 Tablespoon chili powder
2 teaspoons dried oregano
1 can (15 oz) black beans, undrained
1 can (15 oz) pinto beans, undrained
1 can (28 oz) crushed or diced tomatoes, with their juices
1 teaspoon salt, or more to taste
Freshly ground black pepper
Dried red pepper flakes (optional)
2 Tablespoons tomato paste
1/4 teaspoon chipotle powder (up to 1/2 tsp is fine, depending on tastes)
Freshly grated Cheddar cheese
Sour Cream
Sliced Green Onions

Heat the oil in a large, heavy pot over medium-low heat. Add the onion and cook for 5 minutes. Add the garlic and cook until the onion and garlic are soft but not browned, about 1 minute longer. Add the meat and break up with a wooden spoon.Increase the heat to medium-high and add the cumin, chili powder, and oregano. Cook, stirring frequently, until the meat is browned and cooked through, about 7 minutes.Add the chipotle powder, tomato paste, black beans, pinto beans, and diced tomatoes, with their liquids, and bring the chili to a boil. Reduce the heat to low, cover the pot, and let the chili simmer, gently stirring occasionally until thickened and the flavors are concentrated, about 45 minutes. Add the salt, then taste for seasoning, adding more salt as needed, black pepper to taste, and red pepper flakes, if using. Serve the chili hot with bowls of grated cheese and sour cream on the side, if desired, and corn bread. If you are not planning on serving the chili at this time, let it cool to room temperature. It can be refrigerated, covered, for up to 3 days or frozen for up to 3 months.

Chipotle Cornbread with Cheddar Cheese and Green Onions
3/4 cup cornmeal
1 cup all-purpose flour
3 teaspoons baking powder
1/2 teaspoon salt
1/4 cup sugar
1 egg
1 cup milk
2 Tablespoons unsalted butter, melted
2 Tablespoons chopped chipotle chilies (optional)
1/3 cup sliced green onion tops
1/2 cup grated Cheddar cheese

Preheat an oven to 425 degrees. Butter a 9x5 inch loaf pan.In a large bowl, combine the cornmeal, flour, baking powder, salt and sugar. Stir to mix. Make a well in the center.In another bowl, combine the egg and milk and whisk until just blended, about 10 seconds. Add the melted butter, chipotle chilies, green onions and cheese and whisk until smooth. Pour the egg mixture into the well in the flour mixture and fold gently until the batter is just blended.Spoon the batter into the prepared pan and bake until a toothpick inserted into the center of the cornbread comes out clean, about 18 to 20 minutes.

I'm back!

2009-11-16T09:24:00.004-05:00

I'm alive. After dealing with nasty bronchitis and a trip to Raleigh for work, I feel like I'm slowly getting my life back together. It feels good. Hopefully, I can get back on the regular homework track. I feel so behind! This past weekend, we had a billowing Nor'easter. I was in Raleigh for the worst of it, which I was grateful for and upset about at the same time. I wanted to be home with my family instead of being lonely in a hotel room. A king size bed for one, is just not that enjoyable. Since I wasn't in town, I didn't take pictures of the crazy weather but I assure you it was CRAZY.

As I was driving on the back roads on the way home from Raleigh, I drove through small, old towns along the way. On the outskirts of these towns, I saw countless numbers of old, abandoned houses. My mind started to wander about the history of these houses, and the families who may have lived there. How old were the houses? What was their story? Despite the crumbling of the wood, and the ivy growing up the side- there is something so beautiful about them. I'm sure they each had a story to tell, if walls could talk. Here are some of my favorites-

culinary rockstar / pioneer woman!

2009-11-04T09:01:00.003-05:00

While I typically try to plan out a menu for the week, lately I have been in the mood to just cook what I feel like eating at the end of the day. Maybe its because I'm swamped with school work. Who knows. Luckily I love inventing new dishes and get a thrill out of making a meal out of the contents of my pantry or fridge, so I am able to put dinner on the table, get rid of leftovers, and have a creative outlet all at once! I plan on making this at some point this week.

Italian Tortellini Soup

In a big stock pot, combine:
Chicken or vegetable stock
Canned tomatoes
Veggies and Greens: I have carrots and a lone zucchini on hand, as well as some kale from the farmer's market (I heart kale. Buy some today.). Use added onion and garlic. You could substitue fresh spinach leaves for the kale, but just be sure that you leave the greens out and add them at the end of cooking, with the pasta.
Canned Beans: canellini beans, but garbanzos (chick peas) would also be a good choice.
Frozen Tortellini or Mini Ravioli: Once the broth/tomato/veggie/bean mixture has come to a boil, toss in a bag of frozen tortellini and simmer until tortellini is tender.

Cheese: fresh mozzerella is a favorite of mine. Spoon the soup into bowls, top with some cheese, and pop those suckers under the broiler until the cheese is all bubbly and melted, a la French Onion Soup.

Soup is one of my favorite ways to use what I already have in the kitchen. It saves money and leaves you feeling like a culinary rockstar / pioneer woman!

Vegas in Pictures

2009-11-01T09:29:00.000-05:00

Leo Gets a Bath

2009-10-31T07:22:00.000-04:00

Its really quite sad.

Here he is at the top of the stairs, knowing danger is near.

(notice how his leash is still on, its the only way we can catch him as he bolts down the stairs)

He is not a happy boy.

Resisting arrest.

Notice how his bottom foot is clutching the door in protest.

He's a lab. I don't know why he doesn't like water.

Isn't he supposed to be a water dog?

Reggie

2009-10-30T09:06:00.008-04:00

Jeremy and I tend to name our

holiday family members.

For example, our Christmas Trees are Bob.

Our First Christmas there was Bob, last year was Bob Jr.

You get it.

So we thought it natural to name our pumpkin.

Ladies and Gentleman I introduce you to

Reggie.

We are picking up Reggie's mate today- she will be

fondly known as

Regina.

So above is a picture of Reggie being carved.

Here are Reggie's insides

Here is Pandy, watching the action go down.

Leo wasn't paying attention, he was too busy watching a squirrel.

Slow Cooker Turkey Chili

2009-10-28T10:37:00.000-04:00

POINTS Value: 7
Servings: 4
Preparation Time: 8 min
Cooking Time: 360 min
Level of Difficulty: Easy

Seasoned canned tomatoes and Italian turkey sausage add instant life to chili. Try tomatoes with different seasonings to vary the flavor of your chili.
Ingredients

1 pound(s) raw turkey sausage, hot-Italian variety
14 1/2 oz canned diced tomatoes, with garlic and onions, undrained
15 oz canned pinto beans, undrained
14 1/2 oz canned diced tomatoes, with chilies, undrained
1 medium onion(s), chopped
1/4 tsp table salt, or more to taste
1/4 tsp black pepper, or more to taste

Instructions
Remove sausage from casing and place in a 4-quart or large slow cooker; break up meat with a spoon. Add beans, both cans of diced tomatoes with their liquid and onion; stir.
Cover slow cooker; cook on low setting for 5 to 6 hours. Stir in salt and pepper; garnish with chopped onion if desired and serve. Yields about 1 1/2 cups chili per serving.

Notes
You might find raw Italian turkey sausage in links; four links are about 1 pound. Use two cans of diced tomatoes with chiles if you prefer a very spicy dish.

This weekend...

2009-10-23T09:17:00.003-04:00

The final "M" gets married on Sunday.

The other two "M's" are blessed to be standing

at her side.

Best friends are such a precious gift

and I don't know where I would be

without these girls!

I am lucky to have amazing girlfriends

Not only my M's

but countless girlfriends, who mean the world to me

I love you Melanie!

You will be a beautiful bride

and I'll try

not to cry during the ceremony :)

Ladies, are you looking for a bible study? Check this out.

Ponder on this thought today...

2009-10-20T09:09:00.002-04:00

God can soften and change the hardest of hearts.

Jeans in the Freezer

2009-10-19T09:06:00.002-04:00

So, one of my friends told me that instead of

washing your jeans in the washer

where they risk the tragic possibility of

shrinking

you can roll them up

and put them in the freezer.

The cold temperature kill bacteria

something about putting my jeans next to

raw chicken

just grosses me out.

Matthew Henry's Commentary on Proverbs 31

2009-10-18T12:00:00.004-04:00

I totally set my alarm for PM instead of Am and SLEPT through church. Bummer! So I read one of my favorite scriptures on this cold, rainy morning. So, for all my lady friends out there- don't you just LOVE being a WOMAN? Below of one of my favorite Biblical passages- always encouraging! Please note that it is not meant to be primitive (especially when talking about the man ruling over the wife)- it is meant to be beautiful, encouraging, and full of the unique qualities that a woman holds!

31:10-31 This is the description of a virtuous woman of those days, but the general outlines equally suit every age and nation. She is very careful to recommend herself to her husband's esteem and affection, to know his mind, and is willing that he rule over her. 1. She can be trusted, and he will leave such a wife to manage for him. He is happy in her. And she makes it her constant business to do him good. 2. She is one that takes pains in her duties, and takes pleasure in them. She is careful to fill up time, that none be lost. She rises early. She applies herself to the business proper for her, to women's business. She does what she does, with all her power, and trifles not. 3. She makes what she does turn to good account by prudent management. Many undo themselves by buying, without considering whether they can afford it. She provides well for her house. She lays up for hereafter. 4. She looks well to the ways of her household, that she may oblige all to do their duty to God and one another, as well as to her. 5. She is intent upon giving as upon getting, and does it freely and cheerfully. 6. She is discreet and obliging; every word she says, shows she governs herself by the rules of wisdom. She not only takes prudent measures herself, but gives prudent advice to others. The law of love and kindness is written in the heart, and shows itself in the tongue. Her heart is full of another world, even when her hands are most busy about this world. 7. Above all, she fears the Lord. Beauty recommends none to God, nor is it any proof of wisdom and goodness, but it has deceived many a man who made his choice of a wife by it. But the fear of God reigning in the heart, is the beauty of the soul; it lasts for ever. 8. She has firmness to bear up under crosses and disappointments. She shall reflect with comfort when she comes to be old, that she was not idle or useless when young. She shall rejoice in a world to come. She is a great blessing to her relations. If the fruit be good, the tree must have our good word. But she leaves it to her own works to praise her. Every one ought to desire this honour that cometh from God; and according to this standard we all ought to regulate our judgments. This description let all women daily study, who desire to be truly beloved and respected, useful and honourable. This passage is to be applied to individuals, but may it not also be applied to the church of God, which is described as a virtuous spouse? God by his grace has formed from among sinful men a church of true believers, to possess all the excellences here described.

so.

2009-10-16T21:11:00.003-04:00

So its Friday night and this is what we did:

Came home and changed into my ultra fab gear, a hoodie. Went to the commissary only to find out it was closed. What type of grocery store closes at 7pm? REALLY!? Walked around the Exchange and bought a cheap dvd and pumpkin spice latte. Went home, took the dogs to my mom's backyard so they could "go potty". (Walking your dogs in the rain sucks, I'd much rather let THEM walk around in the rain alone). Came home again, and now I'm blogging. Oh, and I was just told someone I love VERY VERY MUCH is pregnant and I just can't contain my excitement! I feel like I need to start having some babies. But then again, I look at the daunting amount of school work ahead of me and I feel content. So, I'm taking a poll. WHEN do you think baby mollys or baby jeremys should make their appearance? Here are the stats: I'll be done with course work in May 2011 and then will start studying for comprehensive exams and THEN I'll move onto the dissertation phase, which can take forever but I'm shooting for a year completion. I'm praying I'm completely done in December, 2012. I'm thinking babies should show up in 2012. LOL

Not a girl, Not yet a woman

2009-10-14T09:34:00.002-04:00

Ok, I'm really not trying to relive the whole Britney Spears song but as I was reading CJane's Blog, a quote by one of her neighbors caught my attention. Here it is:

"There is a point where a girl becomes a woman."

She said. A point where a woman becomes a female warrior.

Where her life is no longer a game, it is a genuine battle.

Not to survive only, but to survive and be strong.

I realized, this quote totally sums up my life. In the past few years, I have noticed that I'm definitely not as youthful as I was five-years ago. I go to bed by 10, its harder to lose five pounds, I stress about money and bills and school work, I stress about what I'm making for dinner that night, and I constantly wonder why the laundry doesn't do itself. I realized that I am not "abnormal" but this is merely a typical life of a 28 year old wife, dog-mommy, PhD student. (can i get a witness, that these are normal everyday stresses? thanks). Life is an adventure, but a serious not always fun adventure. I try to live each day and feel, when it is all said and done and I am turning out my light at night, that I had a successful day. I have had to let myself be ok with the fact that my house is often cluttered, the dinners I cook are not always great, I'm about 10lbs heavier than I would like to be, and I probably won't ever be a millionaire (darn it). Even though life often feels like a battle, and sometimes it is, there is always room for joy, laughter, and love. Remember this the next time you burn your chicken- in the grand scheme of things, life is really quite wonderful!

Two Years Ago Today...

2009-10-13T13:17:00.003-04:00

THANK YOU, JEREMY FOR

TWO WONDERFUL YEARS

YOU STILL ARE AND WILL ALWAYS BE

MY PRINCE CHARMING

I LOVE YOU ALWAYS!

Scent of the month...

2009-10-13T13:14:00.002-04:00

I tend to pick candles that flow with the seasonal changes

this is my favorite

scent this month

off to...

2009-10-04T08:23:00.003-04:00

LAS VEGAS!

celebrating our 2 Anniversary

and

MY BIRTHDAY!

see you in a week!

WEIGHT WATCHER LASAGNA

2009-10-03T07:56:00.000-04:00

WEIGHT WATCHER LASAGNA

1 lb. ground turkey or beef
1 lg. onion
1 (14 oz.) can stewed tomatoes
1 (6 oz.) can tomato paste
1 c. water
1 tbsp. sugar
2 tbsp. parsley flakes
1 tsp. basil
2 2/3 c. cottage cheese
4 oz. Parmesan cheese
1 tbsp. parsley flakes
1 tsp. oregano
8 oz. uncooked lasagna noodles
8 oz. Mozzarella cheese

Cook turkey or beef and onion together and drain. Mix tomatoes, tomato paste, water, sugar, 2 tablespoons parsley flakes and basil together and add to turkey and onion. Mix together cottage cheese, Parmesan cheese, 1 tablespoon parsley flakes and oregano; set aside.
Spray 9x13 inch pan with Pam. Layer half of sauce and meat mixture, then half of noodles, all of cottage cheese mixture; half of noodles, then rest of sauce and meat. Top with Mozzarella cheese. Bake covered 1 hour and uncovered 15 minutes at 350 degrees. Let stand a few minutes before serving.

Perspectives.

2009-10-02T09:14:00.002-04:00

Recently, I have realized what a miracle the past two and a half years of my life has been. I realized how blessed I was- this realization hit me like a ton of bricks and I realized that I really owe a lot to the Lord. Here are some recaps about my journey through the past 2 and a half years and my cancer treatments. I hope you realize how blessed and healed I feel

AND HOW FAR I HAVE COME

2.5 years ago I was told I had a rare, aggressive form of cancer

2 months later I told my family

2.5 years ago I was told if I didn't take action quickly

the cancer would eat away at my vital organs resulting in certain death

Here I sit, proudly proclaiming I am cancer free. I am healthy.

2.5 years ago I told Jeremy I would not be able to give him children

2 weeks ago, I was told my uterus is perfectly healthy and I should have no problem conceiving

2.5 years ago, I was told if I took a traditional route of treatment, I would be

bald for my wedding

Jeremy said I would still be the most beautiful woman he had ever seen

2.5 years ago I was taking 13 different medications 2-3x a day (33 pills a day)

Now, I am only taking 6 PILLS A DAY!

2.5 years ago I was afraid of never living out my dreams

this year, I started my Phd

2.5 years ago, I was angry with God and wanted nothing to do with him

2 weeks ago, my faith and love for Him was renewed

2.5 years ago, I was embarrassed to lean on anyone. I did not tell anyone what I was going through

Now, I proudly talk about my cancer and the miracle I have been given

2.5 years ago, I was scared I would die.

I will be 28 in 10 days.

2.5 years ago, I thought I was the unluckiest person in the world

in 2 weeks, my husband and I will celebrate our 2nd anniversary

he is my rock, my best friend, and I fall more in love with him everyday

Thank you Jeremy for marrying me anyways.

2.5 years ago, I had no idea what was going to happen

2 weeks ago, I realized that Jeremiah 29:11 was always true

Regardless of life circumstances.

I now realize how blessed I am.

How LUCKY I am

How grateful I am to have a God who LOVES ME

How much I love my husband

How much I love my family

How much I love my best friends (M's!)

My last pill will be taken on December 12th.

I think its time to celebrate.

I-Thou, I-It

2009-09-30T15:29:00.002-04:00

Martin Buber states that communication is "a relation between persons that is characterized in more or less degree by the element of inclusion"....One of Buber’s greatest contribution’s to the field of communication was in his explanation of the unique differences between dialogue and monologue communication styles. Dialogue communication is an “I-Thou” relationship, requiring genuine interest amongst the parties involved. “I-it” is more or less, a conversation with an individual who is seen as a mere object. Their thoughts and/or feelings are disregarded. Whilst reading Buber, I was brought back to a time in my life, where I treated God like an “it” although He always treated me as a “Thou”. I was angry with him and therefore had no interest in His plans, thoughts, or desires for my life. I disregarded Him and communicated with Him in ways that showed that disregard. Buber believed that dialogue is conscious-oriented; thought must be placed into the conversation. My “monologue” with God was a means to an end.

Along with that, a good reading is The Narrow Ridge by Arnette. On page 173, he says "The narrow ridge requires a balancing of concern for self and other in proportionate amounts for what is needed by the situation...” God always abides by the narrow ridge- His steady concerns for us do not waiver.

How often do we communicate with, and treat people as though they are an "it"... shouldn't we always communicate with people as though they are a Thou? We should-after all that person you are talking to was made in the image of God.

Nutty.

2009-09-29T09:09:00.003-04:00

Life is a bit nutty right now, which always translates to a blog full of bullets.

Jeremy and I are flying to Vegas on Sunday for a vacation. We haven't been on a vacation since our honeymoon (2 years ago!). Combined with the fact that I'll be 28 two days BEFORE our anniversary, we figured we would celebrate big. We're staying at the Excalibur (the one that looks like a big castle).
I'm working on a paper for journal submission. Wish me luck! I'm writing on the use of feminine style in the 2008 Presidential Election and how President Obama utilized it to his advantage.
I think Fall is finally coming to Virginia Beach. After two back and forth temperatures, we awoke to a crisp, sunny morning. I need to pull out my fall decorations tonight and the "Fall-ification" process will commence as soon as possible. To Do: hit up the farmer's market for pumpkins, squash, and gourds. A fall home is not complete without them!
Did you know that if you let a sweet potato hang out in your pantry while you go on a two week vacation that it will sprout little green things? And that if you plant that potato in a container on your front porch those little green things will turn into a beautiful trailing vine? It is true.

Spiritual Enlightenment here

Spicy Black Bean Cakes

2009-09-23T09:25:00.000-04:00

Spicy Black Bean Cakes
from Everyday Food

5 points for your WW fans

2 tablespoons olive oil

4 scallions, thinly sliced

6 garlic cloves, pressed

1 to 2 jalapeno chiles, finely chopped (ribs and seeds removed for less heat, if desired)

1 tablespoon ground cumin

2 cans (15.5 ounces each) black beans, drained and rinsed

Coarse salt and ground pepper

1 large sweet potato, peeled and coarsely grated (2 cups) (I used a russet, because it's all I had on hand)

1 large egg, lightly beaten

1/2 cup plain dried breadcrumbs

Lime Sour Cream (see recipe, below)

Directions

Heat broiler.

In a small skillet over medium heat, warm 1 tablespoon olive oil. Cook scallions until softened, 1 minute. Add garlic, jalapeno, and cumin; cook until fragrant, 30 seconds. Transfer to a large bowl.Add beans to bowl; mash with a fork or a potato masher, leaving about 1/4 of the beans whole. Season generously with salt and pepper. Fold in sweet potato, egg, and breadcrumbs. Divide into 8 balls of equal size; flatten into patties.Brush a baking sheet with remaining tablespoon oil; place patties on sheet, 1/2 inch apart. Broil 4 inches from heat until golden brown, 8 to 10 minutes. With a thin metal spatula, carefully turn cakes. Broil until crisp, 2 to 3 minutes more. Serve with Lime Sour Cream.

For the Lime Sour Cream:

In a small bowl, combine 1/2 cup reduced-fat sour cream with 2 teaspoons fresh lime juice and 1 small minced jalapeno chile (ribs and seeds removed for less heat, if desired) season with coarse salt.

A little bit of this...

2009-09-22T08:47:00.002-04:00

On Sunday, Jeremy and I went to church for the first time in a long time. It felt amazing. I think it is hard to describe how much I missed going to church. Honestly, I didn't realize how much I missed it until I sad down and listened to a message on Matthew 24-25. I loved it. I plan on going to church for a month to see if this is the right church.

In the mornings, I get to work before any of my coworkers. The phones are typically silent, so it allows me a little time to read The Word and catch up on CS Lewis (always a fantastic way to start the day). Lately I've been starting with some readings from My Utmost for his Highest and A Year with C.S.Lewis. The other day, I could not help but notice the connections between the two, completely unrelated readings for September 18th. I wrote parts of them in my journal and thought I'd share their words with you today:

"Satan does not tempt us just to make us do wrong things--he tempts us to make us lose what God has put into us through regeneration, namely, the possibility of being of value to God. He does not come to us on the premise of tempting us to sin, but on the premise of shifting our point of view, and only the Spirit of God can detect this as a temptation of the devil." ~ Oswald Chambers"

Now Faith, in the sense in which I am here using the word, is the art of holding on to things your reason has once accepted, in spite of your changing moods. For moods will change, whatever view your reason takes. I know that by experience. Although I am a Christian, I do have moods in which the whole thing looks very improbable: but when I was not being fed at church, I had moods in which Christianity looked terribly probable. This rebellion of your moods against your real self is going to come anyway. That is why Faith is such a necessary virtue: unless you teach your moods 'where they get off', you can never be either a sound Christian or even a sound "Whatever-Christian" (My term for being a Christian, but not really growing- the response to this everything is "whatever"), but just a creature dithering to and fro, with its beliefs really dependent on the weather and the state of its digestion.

Consequently one must train the habit of Faith.The first step is to recognise the fact that your moods change. The next is to make sure that, if you have once accepted Christianity, then some of its main doctrines shall be deliberately held before your mind for some time every day. I've realized that churchgoing is a necessary part of the Christian life... We have to be continually reminded of what we believe. Neither this belief nor any other will automatically remain alive in the mind. It must be fed. And as a matter of fact, if you examined a hundred people who had lost their faith in Christianity, I wonder how many of them would turn out to have been reasoned out of it by honest argument? Do not most people simply drift away?" ~C.S. Lewis from Mere Christianity

I let my moods turn me into "a creature dithering to and fro." I let Satan gradually "shift my point of view" until I am at a place where I am no longer "of value to God." And that happens because I do not hold the doctrines of Christ "deliberately beofre my mind for some time every day." I foolishly expect my beliefs to "remain alive in my mind" as though I expect the lessons of College Algebra to stay alive in my mind despite 10 years without practice. Silly girl. Thank goodness for Grace.

Cool Wife Points.

2009-09-18T15:07:00.003-04:00

For all you married women out there (or those who plan to be...take notes!), I want to share a brilliant concept with you:

Cool Wife Points.

Essentially, Cool Wife Points are earned when you do something really awesome for your husband that you might not have otherwise done and it results in the reaction of, "Dude, my wife is awesome" from your man.

Potential opportunities for earning Cool Wife Points include participating in an activity you don't love (a sporting event? camping?), choosing to play it cool in a situation that would normally make you crazy, and in general busting the stereotype of a high-maintenance, nagging wife.

Ladies, I am going to rack up some MAJOR Cool Wife Points this weekend. You see, it is college football season, which means my husband does not leave the couch unless it is to use the facilities. I will not bother him on Saturday. Cool Wife Points.

Here's the deal. I could pout. I could complain. But I know these little things make Jeremy happy- and afterall, he does put up with my crazy schedule the rest of the week. And he will get to soak up quality time with his dog and the television.

I just think that is way cooler than the pouty wife on the couch. And my Cool Wife Points go through the roof! So get out there and start earning some Cool Wife Points! I wish I could say that there is some sort of prize bank from which you can earn designer handbags and spa treatments for your efforts, but I'm afraid you'll just have to earn them out of the goodness of your heart. Of course, a killer birthday present is also a good way to redeem those points. Ahem, my birthday is coming up.

Honey?

Are you reading???

Hello?????

no words needed-

2009-09-14T12:46:00.001-04:00

and still...

2009-09-14T12:44:00.000-04:00

this weekend...

2009-09-11T14:56:00.002-04:00

Is Melanie's Bachlorette Party.

This weekend... is an 80's themed weekend.

This weekend... we are going to Georgetown in Washington DC.

This weekend, I am wearing my legwarmers, heart shaped lense sunglasses, turquoise earrings... you get the pictures..

Pictures of the mayhem when we return.

'au naturale'

2009-09-08T16:25:00.000-04:00

So I was reading this lady's blog the other day. She is a mother of four who shares wonderfully entertaining stories about her little brood of rugrats. She also is very natural, opting for cloth diapers, organic food, and delayed/limited vaccination of her children. I have heard of all of these things, and though I am not sure what we will do on these issues when we have children, I've enjoyed her perspective. But one 'au naturale' choice of hers made me pause...They do not circumcise their sons. You can read her blog for yourself to get the nitty gritty on why they have made this decision, but in a nutshell they didn't think anything of it until assigned a research paper on the topic for their childbirth class. They began thinking they'd write a paper on why you should circumcise, yet through the process of their research their minds were changed. Now, I haven't given much thought on the "to circumcise or not to circumcise" issue. I just assumed it was a given. Wierd.

My perfect morning.

2009-09-07T11:00:00.000-04:00

This morning, when the alarm went off, I opened my eyes just a sliver and looked around. On my left, my peacefully sleeping husband. On my right, my adorable Pandy, sprawled out and taking up more than her fair share of the bed. At the bottom of the bed, my Leo boy curled up with his daddy. To their advantage, they are both pretty cute when they are sleeping, so I let them both cuddle up with us. There we were. Just the four of us. Our little family. All snuggled up and warm. Just a little slice of perfect on this holiday morning.

Now tell me...how is a girl supposed to get out of bed on a day like this!?!

Well, you weren't there to give me an answer, so I didn't.

I just laid there and soaked it up.

I soaked up my little slice of perfect.

Today is gonna be a good day...

2009-09-05T11:00:00.000-04:00

When you start your car on a Saturday morning and the first thing you hear is Madonna's "Like a Prayer" busting through the speakers, you know it's gonna be a good one. And when that tune is followed by Maroon 5's "This Love," Bryan Adams' "Everything I Do," and Natasha Beddingfield's "Pocket Full of Sunshine," you know it can only get better. It was like the radio deejay knew exactly what I needed to kick start this weekend!

So here's the thing.

2009-09-04T15:48:00.002-04:00

Goodness, it has been awhile since my last post.

Almost a week!

What is wrong with me?

I'll tell you:

I am working. A lot. And going to School. With lots of reading.

And I've been thinking about that lately. You see, I really enjoy my job. Not just in a "yeah, it's kinda fun and pays the bills" kind of way, but it an "I feel called to work with college students" kind of way and its providing me the opportunity to do so. That is why I am working on my PhD- its needed to teach college age students. I want to be a teacher. I love my job. But I love lots of other things too. And when my job does not allow for me to do those other things, I get a bit sad. A bit grumpy. When I don't have time to cook. When my house is a mess. When I can't spend time with my husband and I can't go to yoga. When the weather is nice and I finally have a yard and I really want to plant some stuff in it. Oh, for more hours in the day! I try to make time for these things as much as I can. A little here. A little there. Because ultimately I believe that we choose to make time for what is valuable to us. So that is what I will do. And in a few years this busy season of my life will be over and I will have other challenges to look forward to. But tonight I will go to yoga. I will cook dinner. And I might do a load of laundry. And I will take note from the little self-observation I have made: in order for me to be happy, I must make room for all my loves. For my husband. For my dogs. For my yard. For my kitchen. For the outdoors. For books. For yoga. For this blog. Because when that balance is in place, everything I do is better for it.