Friday, December 11, 2009

You know what?

If the 17-year-old version of me could see me now, she would probably throw up. You see, when I was 17- I wanted to get married young, whilst still in college-At like 20 (thank God this didn't come to fruition). I wanted to get pregnant and have a baby before 25 (again, PTL this did not happen). Instead, I got married at 26, over a year AFTER I finished my Masters degree. A year and a half later, I started my Doctorate, and I still have no babies.

Before I got married, I had a very full time job (still do). I was a modern, independent, working woman. I lived with my best friend, had a cute place.... I did find and marry “Mr. Right.” The one who who encourages me to continue my education and to have Girl's Nights Out. The one, who has the proper view of what a woman should do and should be, which is:

Whatever she damn well pleases.
Seriously Ladies, I never couldda married a guy who thought my place was in the kitchen, or ironing his clothes. Screw that.
I have a friend who is the perfect little Modern Molly Homemaker.
She gets herself up early (as in E-A-R-L-Y)
to pack her Hubby's lunch and give him a kiss before he leaves for the day.
She has homemade dinners on the table every night,
and her hobbies included things like sewing quilts, curtains, and Prom dresses.
Making bread. Canning Jam. Gardening.
Her house is always clean. Seriously.
I'm not making any of this up.
I can't decide whether she is either stupid, or crazy.
Now I know that not all women are like me, and some women like to be stay at home mothers, non-working women, dependent on their husbands. And this in itself is beautiful, because it is what that woman "damn well pleases" to be. I have realized that there is a beauty in diversity.
However, I guess a part of me feels sorry for women who didn't get to have that period of life where they were fiercely independent, bounced checks, had crazy nights out with girlfriends, ate an apple and had a glass of wine for dinner, etc. I consider these single days with my girlfriends some of the most memorable times I have had in my life. I learned how to take care of and support myself, which I believe makes me a better caregiver. I learned how to balance keeping a clean house, working 50 hours a week, and going to graduate school. But again, these are the choices I have made. I will probably never be a 100% stay at home mom- Its just not me. I will probably always teach at least one class or aerobics or something... and you better believe that I'm not torturing myself through my doctoral studies to stay at home. Again, I am unique. I love being my own person, feeling accomplished, and challenging myself- daily. So I encourage you working women, stay at home mothers, students, etc., to challenge yourself daily. Whatever you choose to do, whether it is reading a good book, a challenging workout, a DYI project, always do something that makes you feel accomplished. There is nothing better than going to bed at night, feeling that you had a productive day!