Potlucks. To do or not to do?

'Tis the season for Christmas potlucks. Jer and I recently attended one. You probably did too. Or you're planning to this weekend.

Has anyone ever stopped to think about how funny potlucks really are? I mean, a bunch of people who you may know or may not know, who may cook or may not cook are asked to bring some sort of food--any sort of food!--to a gathering to share with others. Have you ever felt really great after eating a potluck meal? Have you ever come away saying, "Now that was a great meal. " No you haven't. Because you probably had some random pasta salads, a roll, a crappy lasagna, funeral potatoes and a carrot. And a chocolate chip cookie. Then, if by chance the lasagna was decent and you want a little more to fill you up (because the potatoes were a big NO), you find (after waiting in line again) that everyone else had the same idea and the lasagna is gone.

The potluck we attended included cold Little Caesars pizza, wontons and egg rolls, olive tapinade, raw fish (we think?), and enchiladas. Along with, of course, pasta salads, cheese and cracker plates (one of which we brought), lasagna and funeral potatoes. After coming away less than filled, and a little nervous about what little we were filled with, Jer and I decided to make a list of Potluck Dos and Don'ts:

Don't
1. Have a potluck.
2. Bring raw meat.
3. Celebrate your heritage (there's nothing worse than chasing bad lasagna with fishy wontons).
4. Bring leftovers from the fridge (now what could this crowd help us get rid of?)
5. Have a potluck. (Did I say that already?)

Do
1. Stay home if you're invited to a potluck.

You can thank us for our words of wisdom later, but if you're in the mood, we love a pasta salad/peanut butter sandwich/chow-mein combo.

Nothing says Christmas like indigestion.